On the Mats 1
Onegaishimasu
(please teach me)
Fear and flow dance awkwardly.
This moment collides with hints of elsewhere.
Unfazed by hesitation,
trust colludes
with the imperative for wholeness and halos.
On the Mats 2
Musubi
(the physical, mental, and spiritual blending of uke and nage)
Hands reaching to a partner I can see but cannot find.
My fingers lax, devoid of try,
acclimated to emptiness.
A ten-note mantra of disbelief and resignation.
Extend, Sensei said.
As I open my timid grasp,
my heart races.
To reach again toward the possibility of nothingness seems a reckless choice.
But here I have been guided well before.
I can extend my heart if not yet my hands.
Sensing toward the possibility of connection, my heart speeds
but does not seize.
I find the softening where hands reaching
span the space.
